Back to square one... and then some

It's been two years since the grand "Hardbody Geeks" experiment went live, and after such a long hiatus I was debating coming back here and writing about my fitness exploits and foibles (alright, more foibles than exploits). While part of me just said, "screw it, who wants to read this crap anyway," I realized that this blog serves two major purposes - and no, neither of them are self-serving, look-at-me reasons... despite the fact that I do check the web stats on the site.

First, writing here serves as a sort of motivator. When I did my first P90X iteration, I felt guilty when I didn't write because that usually meant I didn't work out. There was something gratifying about sitting here, drenched in sweat, typing out my complaints about my latest round of Tony Horton torture. Second, and probably more importantly, is that this is a sort of cathartic exercise for me. It gives me a chance to rant, rave, bitch, and complain about my pain without having to bother those around me. In a way I'm suffering in silence... minus those that actually take the time to read this.

Before going into my rant for the day, I think I should offer a few status updates regarding me and Muddy. I'm happy to report that Muddy is still looking trim, and even though there have been a few fluctuations here and there, he looks about the same as he did when we finished our first round. That's definitely not a bad feat considering keeping the weight off for two years is atypical in the world of weight loss. So, hats off to Muddy for maintaining a (mostly) healthy lifestyle.

Then there's me. Honestly, I think I'm back to square one with all of this, or perhaps even square minus two. When I finished P90X I was somewhere in the vicinity of 9% body fat, and I've probably gained back the 10 or so pounds that I lost. While some may think that's not a huge deal, going from 9% body fat back up to 14-15% is somewhat of a downer.

In the midst of all of this I did switch jobs, and that has proven to be a bit of a problem. I had a long training cycle where I was able to work out on a consistent basis, but after that I was back to a place I hadn't been in close to four years - an office. While I did spend a good bit of time in my office at my old job, I was spending 10-12 hours per week teaching Krav Maga. That's a good bit of activity, and when you add on the P90X workouts I was probably getting anywhere from 17-20 hours of "physical activity" each week. Needless to say, I'm nowhere near that total.

I also spent a few months overseas, and that was the final blow to any hope for a workout regimen. Even though the gym was about 20 steps from my door, I had enough work to keep me busy 60-70 hours per week, and when you're in the middle of a not-so-nice place, a cookie, cup of coffee, and some TV makes you feel much better than a workout in air so thick you can slice it with a knife (yes ladies and gentlemen, that is an excuse. I'll get to those later).

When I got back I swore up and down that I would start back up, but my routine was thrown all out of whack because, well, I couldn't get on one. I have been traveling pretty regularly (excuse #2... back off, I'll get there), and my schedule has been in flux for the past few months (excuse #2.5... they're related). Put that all together and you have the recipe for a muffin top.

Since the restarting of a workout regimen is never complete without a set of excuses as to why you stopped it all in the first place, I want to offer you:

Force Trainer's Reasons Why He's a Fat Lazy Slob
(I told you I was getting there)

1. My schedule is anything but regular, so I don't have any time to work out.
2. Traveling makes sticking to a workout regimen hard, and I don't always have the equipment I need when I need it.
3. I spend a lot of time at the office, and the last thing I want to do is workout after commuting upwards of four hours per day.
4. I'm lazy and don't feel like working out all the time.
5. I just purchased a $2,500 gaming rig (I am a geek after all), and I want to maximize my enjoyment by playing on it as much as possible.
6. I've recently discovered the joy of playing guitar, and lose track of time while practicing.
7. I would rather spend the free time I do have with my family.
8. I've rediscovered the joy that is fast food, including Chipotle, McDonald's, and Burger King. A few months without it can seem like a lifetime.
9. My back is a complete and total mess... again.
10. Working out has become discouraging because I feel like I'm behind where I was when I started P90X two years ago.

Okay, okay, I admit, those excuses are just that - excuses. You can make excuses all day, but in the end they're just a replacement for motivation and drive. Since I do recognize that excuses are the easy way out, I'm going to take the over achiever route and tear apart each one in succession just so you all know I realize how much of a pansy I'm being. So, without further ado:
Force Trainer's Rebuttal To His Own Lame Excuses

1. Not having a regular schedule means that I need to work harder to stick to the best regimen possible. On days where I know I'm going to be out of town, I need to plan accordingly. I spent $400 on stackable weights that are extremely portable, so utilizing that feature is probably a good idea.
   
2. See my rebuttal to #1. If I absolutely can't bring the weights with me, I just need to keep some alternative workouts on hand that are body weight based, replace lifting with cardio, or shift around my workout days.
3. After a long day at the office, the best thing I can do is workout. It's a stress reliever, helps me wind down from the day, and ultimately helps me get to bed on time. Would I like more free time? Yes. It's just going to take a little more planning on my part.
4. This is just sad. I'm actually saying outright that I'm just too lazy to workout. I'm now ashamed that I even wrote that.
   
5. $2,500 on a gaming rig? Damn right. Number of hours that it's actually on in a given week? 5-6, and that's mostly work related. Honestly, that wasn't even a real excuse.
6. The guitar thing is legitimate since I can play for 2-3 hours and not even realize it. I'm just going to have to go back to what my Mom used to tell me when I was 6. "You can play when you get your work done." So... no guitar until AFTER the workout.
   
7. Seeing my family is legitimate, but honestly I see my family more now with my crazy job and travel than I ever used to. Again, I just need to plan a little better so I can fit in my workouts. I wonder if my 5 and 6 year old nieces would be able to do a deep swimmer's press.
8. Yes, fast food is wonderful, and when I got back into the country I gorged myself. I tried to be a little better by having a Chipotle burrito bowl (that damn tortilla is 400 calories), but the experience left me feeling hollow and sad. I will be treating myself to those wonderful, fatty, fried, artery clogging foods every now and then. However, that's no different than my first trip through P90X. The occasional trip to the mecca of guacamole and sour cream didn't have any negative effects.
9. My back being a mess does pose a problem, but I found a local chiropractor that is pretty damn good. Let's mark this one as "in progress." I don't foresee it being a problem for much longer.
10. The last one is a mental hump that I need to get over. In all honesty I'm probably not worse off than when I first started, but it sure feels like it. This is where that whole "self-motivation" thing comes in. I just need to remember where I left mine.

There is also additional motivation as to why I need to get back onto this bandwagon. When we first start P90X Muddy was hitting about to hit the milestone of 40 years young, and he didn't want to start off middle age looking like it. Well, this year I'll be reaching the three decade mark, and while my crisis is not nearly as bad as his, I understand the need to maintain a healthy lifestyle.

The second reason is that I'm going to most likely be heading to a new position within my organization next year that will require a higher level of physical performance. While technically there's no standard that I need to adhere to, if I'm going to take the position then I want to be in the best shape possible to be successful. That means on top of looking good I need to actually be able to perform (5 mile runs, wearing tons of equipment, etc.), and that's going to add a whole new wrinkle to this. I'll be using P90X for the next few months to get me back to where I was, but after that I'll be forced to kick things into high gear to actually get to a level of performance that I'll be happy with. It should be an interesting journey, and I'm looking forward to bitching, I mean, sharing it with everyone.
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